A Midsummer Night's Spoof
by Diabolikal Luna
Summary: Ron loves Luna, Draco loves Luna and Hermione loves Draco. Hagrid and Neville prepare a play for Tonks and Remus and why has Dobby turned the milk sour?::
1. Chapter 1

**A Midsummer Night's Spoof**

**By Lassy Luna**

_Based on the Shakespearian play,_

_A Midsummer Night's Dream_

Luna Lovegood and Ron Weasley have been lovers for quite some time, however, Luna's father, Angelo, has already decided that Draco Malfoy would make her perfect suitor. Hermione Granger—one of Luna's friends—is madly in love with Draco but he scorns her very existence.

Remus Lupin is soon to marry Nypmphodora Tonks but she isn't impressed with how he treats the four students who are madly in love. In the mean time, the King and Queen of fairies who live deep inside the Forbidden Forrest, are having relationship troubles of their own.

**Chapter One: Denied Love**

The Great Hall was deserted. Not a single student was sitting in the darkened room and only the outside moonlight shone through the bewitched ceiling of the dining room. There was a calm and sedated feeling in the air, which was shortly interrupted by the arrival of Remus Lupin—the Current Head Master of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry— Nypmphodora Tonks and the floating portrait of the late Albus Dumbledore. A few scatted house elves followed.

Remus began to speak, slightly tiredly but not before looking up at the sky and noticing that the moon was nearly full. "Dearest, Tonks. Our arranged day draws ever closer. In four days time a full moon will have passed and a new one shall arrive, yet I dread it's very presence!" he continued. "She lingers my desires and for long has withered my heart."

Tonks smiled kindly. "Four days will soon pass, Remus. It will only be brief and will quickly wear away. You shall find yourself at my side once more, soon enough," she clutched his hand for a moment and he then loosened it.

"Albus! Alert the portraits and stir up the ghosts," Remus spoke to the hovering portrait of Dumbledore and he floated away without speaking. "Tonks," he said turning back to his lover, "I somehow wooed you with my bite and won your love by mutating but I love every minute you spend with me," he finalised.

Suddenly, their conversation is cut short because of an eruption of argumentative speech from four new arrivals. Luna Lovegood's eyes are paled with tears as she is pulled from her hooded school robes to her Head Master by her father, Angelo. Two other students, a year older than the girl, rush behind as the angered father pulls her with him. The first is Ronald Weasley, a tall, lanky boy with fiery red hair and a freckly face. The last follower is Draco Malfoy, an equally tall boy, yet slightly better built, with matted blonde hair and pale eyes. A very similar looking boy to Luna.

Angelo wasted no time. "Remus, the renowned Head Master of this school!" he exclaimed.

Remus shook hands with the angered parent, fully aware that he had arrived at the school earlier that day and had been avoiding him. "Thanks, Angelo, my old friend. What news do you have for me?" he asked briskly, trying to ignore Luna's whimpers.

"I come with a rather hefty complaint, I am afraid. My only child—my daughter—Luna," his voice was far from quiet, "Draco, my fine lad, come here," the blonde haired boy moved to Luna's fathers side, "this boy has my consent to marry Luna when she is of age," he seemed restless in his speech. "Get here, Ron!" the girls father almost spat his name, "this boy has bewitched my daughter! He has obviously given her some kind of love potion and exchanges romantic notes and small tokens of his affection with her. I have on good authority heard that he spends endless nights in the Ravenclaw Common Room with her and she now swims in a world of unrealistic fantasy!" he took breath for a moment. "This boy has challenged the goodness in my daughters soul and if she does not consent to marry Draco, rather than this boy," he gestured to Ron, "then you must allow me to dispose of her as she is mine and this gentleman's," he pointed to a rather smug looking Draco, "she shall marry Draco or receive the Dementors kiss."

Remus appeared slightly taken aback but the girls father was far from rational. "What say you, Luna," he began quickly and in whisper, "Be advised, my good student. To you, you father should appear as a god. It was he who gave you life and he feels that he can take what he gave you, back. Be cautious with your answer. Draco is a worthy boy," he said somewhat reluctantly.

Luna spoke for the first time and her voice trembled, "So is, Ron!"

Remus could not deny that Ron was not one of the nicest boys in the school but her father was obviously expecting more. "In himself, he is," The Head Master admitted, "but in your fathers voice, you must be satisfied with the worthier," Ron's jaw dropped.

"Well," Luna's voice picked up slightly, "perhaps my father should look through my eyes," she glared at the people around her.

"Your father considers his judgement to be best and for sure, you must rest with the acceptance of his opinion," he didn't rush his words.

"Professor—please forgive me but I don't understand what power he feels that he holds me by!" Luna's moon-like eyes reflected Remus' face. "And I don't see how it should affect me. As my father seems to think you have a say in this matter, I beg to know what my worst should be if I deny the marriage to Draco?" her eyes were glossy with tears and she pulled her hand over her blond plait.

Remus looked pained. "Either to receive what your father has decided upon you—the Dementors Kiss—or to forever live a life without men. Luna, you must question your desires and examine your blood," he sighed, "if you decide not to marry Draco, I will see that you are protected from him by sending you to a convent. There you will live the life of a Muggle without magic or men and with only the essentials to keep you alive. Endless hours you will spend, chanting under a full moon to a God that has never even been proven to exist," Remus' intentions were only good and far safer than her father's relief.

Luna's voice was still croaky and she didn't seem to care for the words that were about to escape her lips. "So will I grow, so live, so die, Professor," she stammered, "I shall not give up on the one who I adore with my life. My life so shall it be, I would rather spare than love another."

"Think about your words, Luna," Remus said, rubbing his worn eyes, "by the next new moon I shall expect an answer worthier to more than your heart," he gestured slightly, "That day, be prepared to loose your soul as you so wish, for unless you are to marry Draco, your fathers wishes will be met and your short life will have been in vein," he continued sadly.

Draco stepped forward. "My, Luna," she glared at him, "please reconsider-- for you are as suited to me as honey is to bee," she rose her eyebrow and Ron made sick noises. "Weasley, back off and keep your hands away from what is rightly mine!"

Ron glared at Draco aggressively. "You obviously fancy her father, Malfoy. Will you not let her fancy me?" he shouted and Luna stifled a giggle with her hand as Ron's ears turned pink.

Luna's father whipped forward. "It is true that he has my blessing—something that you shall never gain from my mouth. As she is mine," he gestured to his daughter, "it is in my right to give her to, Draco!" he shouted aggressively.

"Sir," Ron hissed, "My blood is as pure as his. Recent events have made me as wealthy as he is," each time he spoke, Ron glared at Draco, "the only difference between us, other than the fact I have some decency, is that I have Luna's love! I will fight for her so be it! A wizard's duel to the end. Yet I have the dirt on him, he is not as what he seems. Sir. That man who you have given your daughter permission to marry is no good. One of my best friends—Hermione Granger—is madly in love with him after he praised her very existence," he said this with slight disgust.

Remus tried to shift the balance of despair in the room. "I must confess, Ron, that you make as equal a point as any and from what you have said—although it is no business purely of mine—your friend should certainly reconsider her paths. I must leave now and Angelo, Draco, I wish for you to come with me as there is something we must speak about. As for you, Luna, I must insist that look upon your fathers offer for if you do wish to do your fathers bidding, your soul will be spared. If not," Remus' voice trailed off. "Come, Tonks," he turned to the pink-haired woman, who was glaring at him with almost pure hate, "what's wrong, my dear?" he asked, noticing the frown, "we must find something to cheer you up," he added, "Draco, Mr Lovegood."

Everyone left, leaving the distraught Luna sitting beside the Gryffindor table and Ron standing above her. He looked down and offered her his hand yet she remained on the floor, unaware of him but still sensing his presence.

"What now, my Luna?" You're so white! Never has a rose paled so quickly. Surely you do not believe that I would let them—"

"The tears in my eyes speak for us both. Do not pretend to not see what is written so clearly," she turned her head and stared up at him.

"We always knew there would be some problems. Love is such a peculiar thing and it's not meant to run smoothly," he added. "If only I had been born—"

"It's just not fair!" Luna cried as he pulled her to her feet.

"I know," he replied back.

"We live in a time when stuff like this is outlawed!" she moaned.

"You'd think!"

"Oh, hell! What has become of life and love?" Luna rested herself into Ron's side and he put his arm around her.

"There was little sympathy in Remus' voice; yet, I feel he tried. War, death and sickness, seems less hard than love," he sighed, "so quickly has confusion arrived. We must think of a solution," he paused.

"Nobody believes that love can remain true—not in a time of war. They don't understand. They believe that love is just a dream, so easily devoured by the darkness," she wiped her hand over her eyes.

"Luna. A thought has just struck me," he released her from the embrace, "I have a muggle aunt, widowed," he began, "I was always her favourite and she is fortunate in every way. She thinks of me as a son and lives but a few miles away. If we were to hide in the Forbidden Forest and cross through to the other side, we could escape all of this," he hoped and even the thought of giant spiders wasn't enough to scare him. "Luna. You must marry me now—despite our ages—because I will not let you be harmed in any way," Luna went to speak but he stopped her, "Luna, wait for me by the edge of the forest tomorrow evening, beside Hagrid's Hut. From there we will leave and when we return, be bound forever!"

"Ron!" Luna practically fell around his shoulders as he kissed her on the forehead. "I swear by all the Thestrals that pull the schools carriages. I swear on the lives of all the Crumple-Horned Snorckacks that ever graced the planet. I promise on all the Gulping Plimpsies that I have ever seen, that I will wait for you under the full moon. Rain or fine. Dull or shine."

"Your promise means the world to me, Luna. Don't threat—here's Hermione. I am sure she will settle you!" Ron said cheerfully as he waved to his friend.

"How are you, Hermione?" Luna asked pleasantly but sensing the strangeness in her tone and because she had heard the end of their conversation, Hermione turned to leave, "why do you wish to leave so soon?"

Hermione glared at Luna. "You ask me why I wish to leave?" she snapped, "because Draco would do anything for and with you, yet every time my name is mentioned or I try to speak to him, he shoes me away and I see your heart in his eyes!" her tone saddened slightly, "oh for why I could not be like you? Born and bred in such the way that made you worthy for him and not I. If only my blood was as pure as the liquid that runs through your veins. If only the Polyjuice potion could do more than disguise."

"I hate him," Luna assured Hermione, "I'd gladly let you have him if only he would go."

"Oh if only it could be so."

"I curse and swear yet he leaves me extravagant gifts," Luna added.

"If only he would read me in the same way."

"The more I hate him, the more he wants me," Luna moaned.

"The more I try to love him, the more he hurts me."

Luna turned to face Hermione. "It's not my fault if he can't resist me," she complained. "He is no fault of mine."

"But if I were you, he would love me," Hermione sighed.

"Hermione, do not threat for Draco will no longer be able to see my face," Luna said cunningly, "Myself and Ron are going to leave this place and get married not too far away. For a while heaven was turned into hell but now it seems that we will remain happy after all!" she exclaimed.

Ron, who had been listening to their words, smiled slightly, his complete trust resting with Hermione. "Hermione, do you not see how we wish to be?" he asked her, "Luna and I are in love and if it is Malfoy who you wish to crave upon, I'm not going to stop you but for now you must remain silence. Please, my friend!" he didn't seem to think there was a problem.

Luna spoke once again. "We will flee through the wood where you and I have spent many days hovering around. We shall sleep on the grass and feed off the flowers, until we pass through to the other side," Luna informed her friend, "Unless we do return to Hogwarts, we will seek a new life and make new friends. Ron, do not forget our promise and Hermione good luck with Draco, when he sees what kind of a person you are he will forget his troubles. Till tomorrow, Ron," Luna said sweetly, as she left her lover and Hermione.

"Good bye, Hermione," Ron said, "As you love Draco, I hope he shall soon love you!" he didn't seem too sure but left the room before she could complain.

Hermione sighed and spoke softly to herself. "How happy some can find themselves. I was always considered just as pretty as she—more so in most cases. Draco does not like me for my heritage and I cannot fault him on that. It was the way he was brought up. I admire him, yet she scorns him and still, he stares at her with those puppy-dog eyes that I so desperately imagine watching me. Perhaps I could gain his affections? I shall tell him of Luna and Ron and their plans to set flight. Then, he will pursue her in the wood and I will gain his thanks. He will give me credit for her expense!" Hermione said, her attitude more pleasing. "Go now, I shall and forget the pain!"

Hermione looked around the room for a moment and finally looked as though she had gone utterly mad. Moving extremely quickly, she abandoned the Great Hall and left for the Gryffindor Common Room, where she would ponder in her thoughts and dream about Draco.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Wedding Fools**

Hagrid's hut was rather crowded. There was very little space for any of the men that had joined him in his small home. On the table were a few dozen rock cakes and a jug of pumpkin juice and all the furniture had been pushed to the sides of the hut and six chairs—one rather large one—had been laid out in a circle formation.

The five people who had joined Hagrid were; Neville Longbottom, Colin Creevey, Dennis Creevey, Fred Weasley and George Weasley. They were all looking rather anxious and none of them had touched the rock cakes Hagrid had put out.

"Is everyone here?" Neville said, looking about and noting the faces.

Hagrid was the last to sit down and the chair broke beneath him. He quickly stood up. "You'd be best to call everyone generally—in order of the script," he said.

Neville took a roll of parchment from his pocket and began to examine it. "Here is the magical list of all those who were called forward," he stated, "we were the ones selected to perform for Head Master Lupin and his soon-to-be-wife, Tonks."

"Neville, my lad," Hagrid's tone suggested that he was getting impatient, "first tell us what the play is about and then read the names of the actors. Basically, get to the point."

"The play is about marriage," Neville described and Fred and George both made noises as if they were about to puke. "The story tells the most horrific tale and death of Pyramus and Thisbe," at the sound of the word 'death,' the twins had become far more interested.

"A fine play—I promise you that. I once saw it performed by Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore in their youth," Hagrid informed his students, "Now, Neville—call forth the actors. There's a good lad."

"Okay," he rocked backwards on his chair and then steadied himself. "Rubeus Hagrid," he began.

"Ready!" Hagrid exclaimed excitedly, knocking a large flowerpot full of puss onto the floor. "Name who it is I am to be!"

"You, Hagrid, are set to play Pyramus."

"Who is Pyramus?" Hagrid asked, apparently the version he had seen was not as memorable as he had suggested. "A lover? A god? A tyrant …"

"You portray a man who kills himself for love," Neville informed Hagrid.

The giant instantly stepped forward and blocked out most of the light in the room. "I shall die in such a way that even the men will not be able to resist the tears from their eyes! Yet," he paused, "I am far more suited as a tyrant," he stepped forward and one of the floorboards sprung up and Hagrid kicked it down again. Seeing that Neville was not going to condole, Hagrid rested against the wall. "Very well."

"Colin Creevey?" Neville piped.

"Here, Neville!" the boy exclaimed, taking a picture of Neville with a large camera. Neville shielded his eyes apprehensively.

"Colin. You will be performing as Thisbe."

"Oh Goody-o!" Colin smiled a wide toothy grin, "am I to be a wondering knight?"

"Oh, no! You are the person that Pyramus loves," Neville informed him and Colin looked up at Hagrid, raising an eyebrow.

"Hell no!" Colin moaned. "Please don't make me play a woman—look," he said, "I have a beard coming," George Weasley passed him a small box but Neville confiscated it from him instantly.

"Don't worry about it, Colin. You will be wearing a mask and we'll find a spell to change your voice."

Suddenly, Hagrid stepped forward again. "I can hide my face too! Nobody could recognise me," the others looked at him doubtfully, "I can speak in a tiny voice," he demonstrated as he spoke.

"No, Professor Hagrid!" Neville said sternly, "you must play Pyramus and Colin, you have to be Thisbe."

As Colin crossed his arms in a strop, Hagrid said. "Go on then. Continue."

"George Weasley?"

George placed an extremely good but fake spider on his shoulder. "Here, Nev," he cooed.

"George," Neville began, ignoring the spider that was now crawling down the twins leg, "you must play Thisbe's mother."

George purposely chucked the spider at Neville to show that he wasn't happy but he did not cause any problems, instead, he just said in the most feminine voice he could, "I'll have to practise womanly things on somebody," his brother slid away from him.

"Fred Weasley?"

"Not here, Nev," the second twin stated.

"Of course you are," Neville appeared to be cross at his insincere statement.

"Nah. I'm just an illusion. I was never born," he informed Neville who just ignored the comment.

"You will be Pyramus' father and I myself, will be Thisbe's," he looked at the final person in the room. "Dennis, you shall be the lion and I hope that is all the parts sorted," Neville finalised, now bored by the proceedings.

"Do you have a spare copy of the lions part?" Colin asked. "My brother is a bit of an idiot and slow of learning lines."

"He'll do it perfectly. We'll dress him up in the Gryffindor lion and he can walk about. There are no lines—the lion does nothing but roar," Neville informed his younger peer.

Hagrid roared and Dennis quickly crossed his legs. "I would make a perfect lion," he informed them all, "I can roar louder than the real beast itself. I can roar so well that the Head will ask me to do it again!"

Neville spoke up. "And you'd scare all the younger students and he'd have us all expelled, fired and I'm sure he'd find something for you two," he added, pointing in the twins' direction.

"Punish us all!" everyone but Hagrid and Neville complained.

Hagrid looked unhappy at the thought and tried to save himself the part. "Then I will set my voice a challenge and roar so quietly that I could barely be heard. I would purr instead of roar," he informed them.

"Then you'd just look like a glorified pussycat," George announced.

"Hagrid," Neville sighed and spoke cautiously to his Professor, "You cannot play any part other than Pyramus."

"Very well," the giant huffed, "how should I wear my beard?" his large hand ran through the mat of fur, "long? Straight? Short? Tufted? Crumpled?"

"However," Neville told him, "not at all would be good," he added in inaudible whisper.

"And what colour would best suit it? I shall go to Hogsmede and have it done especially. Perhaps blonde or a colour similar to that of the Weasley's?" he continued, "or even, bright purple."

"I'll make you have it all shaved off and then you will be bare faced!"

"Oh, don't make him do that, Neville. You don't know what will jump out of it," Fred pleaded.

Neville nodded. "Well. There are your parts and I think we should hold a rehearsal tomorrow—somewhere that we won't be noticed," he began to think of where they could go, "somewhere in the forest. Hagrid knows his way around there and I'm sure it will be okay just for this once. We don't want other students to see what is going on. If you don't turn up, I'll have you all sent to Azkaban," he joked.

"You'll be perfectly fine in the forest with me," Hagrid stated, "I cannot think of a better place for us to perform!"

"In the darkest depths we will meet—don't forget your wands," Neville reminded them.

"Oh, shut-up, Neville. Your mouth has been going constantly," Hagrid moaned and began to shoe them out of his house.

All of the males except for Hagrid left. Checking from his window that there was no chance of the coming back, Hagrid pulled a large pink umbrella from under the table and began to mumble some very colourful words.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Dobby, Misty and the Lovers Quarrel**

Sitting alone in the Middle of the Forbidden Forest, on a large, moonlight-highlighted boulder, was a young fairy named Misty. Her hair was long and trailed down to her waist in sweet, blonde locks and her eyes glistened red and bewitching. From nearby, there was a short yelping noise, as Dobby the house elf rushed from out of some bushes, entangled in fine shrubbery.

He noticed Misty and his eyes seemed to bulge. "Hello there, mistress of fine beauty. Why do you sit outside, alone?" he asked in a squeaky voice.

The fairy grinned cheekily. "All around—I've travelled far—amazing distances I've come to pass. Climbing hills and swimming seas and searching burrows as well as leaves. I do venture everywhere, quicker than the fastest hare. I do serve the fairy queen and bring her favours such as gin. I spread the dew as I go and free the waters from their steady flows. I must leave crystals on every petal of every plant in this feral. I must do this for my queen, Nymph," she added, smiling meekly.

"Oh, miss," Dobby's voice rose ever higher, "the fairy king is moody and it would be wise to keep out his way. He's angry with his misses, for she has captured the first Gobble-de-gook and he demands it for his own. Lupe is angry and he's letting it show—four fairies he has now blasted from their toes!" Dobby exclaimed, as he jumped on the spot.

The fairy stood up and moved over towards Dobby, bending down so her hair dropped onto his head. "Am I wrong in thinking this? Please correct me and do dismiss but may I be safe to say, that you the famous house elf, Dobby? Freed from a sock by the hand of the good Harry Potter and then employed by the great Head Master, of the school that is so fondly positioned behind these trees, where you don't work for mere pennies. And is it true that whenever you touch the milk, it turns sour from strict and painful guilt? And is it true that at night, you steal students hats and then take flight?"

Dobby stood back in mock amazement. "You are right, Dobby is me—Head house elf in the Hogwarts kitchens. At night when all the children sleep I wonder the castle and grounds, as I keep, each and every place so neat. Then I travel to these here woods, to meet with Lupe and bring his goods. I tell him jokes and bring him wine and do his bidding till ten past five," the house elf grinned as the fairy twirled around him. "Here he comes, in all his splendour—best be going, as a favour."

Misty bounced lightly in the air, "as that I would have done if you had said sooner but here comes my mistress from the sauna."

Lupe strolled into the clearing, ignoring the presence of Dobby and Misty and instead, glared at Nymph, "you, you," he pointed and stammered, "being proud is a sin in some peoples books," he shouted.

Nymph, beauty with pink hair, clacked her tongue and tutted through her teeth. "Poor jealous, Lupe. Just because I got it first!"

"Lost cause, women!" he shouted, "am I not your lord?"

Her eyes slit. "Then I must be your lady," she twisted herself around and began to circle him, "we go on separate holidays and when I come back, I find you have not the whole story and that you have given consent to the stars and all above," she stopped in front of him, her hair swaying with glitter, "poor Tonks to be married to that! Especially after what you and she," her voice broke off and an image of Remus appeared and faded beside her.

"For shame, Nymph," he spat, "I know what you did."

"Jealousy, jealousy and more jealousy," she repeated, her voice increasing as she spoke. "I have but shared my life and love with you for centauries. Everything that is mine becomes yours. I gave you the sea and the rivers. I gave you the sun and the stars and I passed you the life of freedom and immortality. Why should I not have something of my own?"

"Do not cross me," his voice was steady but fluctuating with anger. "I want nothing but that amazing creature!"

"Then keep wanting," her short dress whipped around in the breeze.

Lupe looked her in the eyes, as though trying to torment her. "How long do you intend to stay in these woods?" he muttered.

"I will stay for the wedding and nothing more. When the moon is at its fullest I shall leave this grove," she looked up into the sky and the twinkling stars caught her eyes.

Lupe glared at Nymph and then loosened his voice. "Give me that creature and I will leave with you and travel over the lands and seas, as you will do."

"Not for the world itself," her eyes flashed angrily, "come fairy companions," several faces appeared in the bushes and then faded again, "we shall rest by mother willow."

Lupe growled and he swirled his body over to where Dobby was standing. "Then go but be warned, I shall but your faults to right before the end of this solemn night," he looked down at Dobby but continued to speak. "Dobby, Dobby—my faithful friend. Do you remember when we stared out at sea and listened to the mermaid sing?"

"Dobby does remember, sir."

His eyes looked perspective. "And do you remember how cupid dropped his arrow below our feet and spread the herb that makes people fall in love with the first being that gets caught in their sight—be them beauty or full of fright?" Dobby nodded in response, "then find this plant and bring it me."

"It will be done, my great, sir. I shall go swiftly like the wings of a bird," and with a very sharp crack, he disappeared out of sight.

Lupe smirked to himself. "I shall watch my sleeping beauty and drop the juice from the herb into her eyes and the next thing that she does see, will become her lover—rather than me. Be it a bear, dog or goose, she'll want to be with him in her soul love," he sighed but then bolted stiffly, "but who is this that comes here? To them I am invisible and will overhear."

Draco was thrashing his hands about in front of himself, as Hermione followed him with her arms opened wide. Her face showed a look of adoration and it was obvious that no herb was needed for her to be in love with him.

Draco turned around abruptly and glared at her, "stop bloomin' following me woman!" he shouted and Lupe moved away from the angry pair, "where is that evil Weasel and my fairest moon? I will kill the redhead and bed the other, as soon as she realises how much I love her."

Hermione wrapped her arms around Draco but he pushed her away. "Your gorgeous, you hard-hearted snake. Why will you not leave her be and fall for me?"

Draco snorted as he continued to walk forward. "Have I ever called you attractive? Have I ever named you good looking? I don't love you for goodness sakes. Get over it."

"But, Draco—we are meant to be," she rested her head on his shoulder and then crouched to the floor, "I'll be your slave. I'll do whatever you want, just say you love me and I will destroy the world."

Draco shook his head. "You make me puke when I see your face."

"And I am sick when I do not look upon yours."

Draco became impatient and pushed her away as she stood up. "I could kill you here and nobody would ever know," he muttered under his breath but she appeared to have heard him.

"Then permit yourself to do it," she began, "I love you," she repeated the line several time, "I would die."

"That's it. Leave me alone or I shall leave you to be eaten by the troll," he shook his head and began to walk away from her, strolling in large circles.

"Run. Leave me, but I promise you that I shall follow," she cooed, her hair blew into his face and Draco swept it away.

"If you do follow me, I will do mischief in the wood," Hermione giggled extremely girl-like.

She closed in on him, "then I best start following," he pushed her away and he sped his feet again, "Draco, do not run from me! I cannot fight for love," she went to reach for her wand but then decided against it. Draco vanished past some towering trees, "I will follow you and if you do field me, then it shall be by the hand I love."

Hermione vanished the same way as Draco had gone and Lupe paced around for a moment, his hand resting along his chin. He looked up at the sky and a small smile spread across his thin lips.

"Do well, fair wonderer. I will cure him of his hate," Lupe spoke to the now-gone Hermione. Dobby fell from the sky, his hands clutching a black flower, "Dobby, my friend—you have the flower in your hand."

"Yes, Mr Lupe, Sir," Dobby handed his master the plant, "as perfect as the seaside's sand."

Lupe ripped the plant in half and handed the larger side back to Dobby. "Take theses petals and venture on, to the greenest bank where there is plenty bird song. Where there lies a sweat girl, who fawns upon a man who does not love her so. Spread the tears of this plant in his eyes, so that when he wakes, he shall no longer pass her by. Be sure that you get the right couple true, for more than one love in this forest, passes through."

"Fear not, sir—your Dobby will do good and save these lovers in the wood."

Lupe, clutching the part of the flower that he had in his hand, ventured through the forest where Nymph had walked through. Dobby walked crab-like in the direction of Hermione and Draco, as he licked his lips and smelt the plant.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: The Fairy Song**

The forest was warming slightly because of the fires that had been lit in a large clearing. The flames were multicoloured and flickered ornate patterns onto the nearby foliage. Several fairies had begun to move into the clearing, the moon reflecting off of their silvery wings.

Nymph began to walk into the clearing, two fairies holding a long sleeping cape off of the dirt as she walked. Her expression was tired an annoyed, as she passed by one of the orange flames and approached a green hammock that swung from two trees.

Nymph smiled as she lay upon the hammock. "Come now, my fairy friends and sing me to sleep. I have become weary and desire you to let me leave for the remainder of the night. As I sleep you may go about your usual chores and pick the flowers of which you adore. Wake me only if a thorny rose calls and let me rest 'till the summer calls," she said softly, tucking her feet into each other.

The fairies began to move around her, as she closed her eyes and tried to fall into a pleasant sleep. The aluminous beings began to dance and there song gathered from a whisper into a loud chorus. One fairy began to take charge of the echoed song.

"I sing to say to keep away, all things horrid and cruel. No slimy, ugly, fluorescent thing, shall harm are favourite fairy queen," the first fairy sang

All of the fairies pulled in together. "We sing this sweet melody, the purest of all remedies, to help our lovely lady, sleep her woes away," the fairies sang, making shadowed patterns with their wings.

The first fairy that sang moved forward from the group swiftly, using her wings to hover above Nymph. "I sing to say to keep away, all monsters that may stray. No snake or carnivorous thing, shall be able to harm a thing," she cooed softly.

The five fairies once again pulled in together to sing the chorus once more. "We sing this sweet melody, the purest of all remedies, to help our lovely lady, sleep her woes away," the fairies sang, making shadowed patterns with their wings.

Nymph began to snore gently and one of the fairies who had been holding her cape, lightly touched down to the ground. "All is silent and all is well. Now we must go, my fairy friends."

The fairies began to fly away from the clearing, completely oblivious to the person who was approaching them from behind. As the very smallest of the fairies disappeared, Loup drifted into the clearing, the flower rested in his hand.

Loup glided to where Nymph was now sleeping and bowed down to release the flowers oil into her eyes. "When my dearest dares to wake, true love shall take, any form and any place, just so long as her eyes should rest, upon his manly sight at best. Be it a human, wizard or house elf, she will fall madly in love, so long as be it not from above. Unsightly, it must seem, so I can claim her as my queen," and with that, Lupe once again left the clearing, with a permanent smile spread across his lips.

Ron and Luna had travelled a long way, as they to, approached the clearing where Nymph was sleeping high in the trees. They both appeared rough, as though they had crossed several paths of mud and pools of stagnant leaves.

"My, Luna. You have become slow of travel. You must be tired. I know how you must feel. We shall rest here," Ron gestured to the clearing, "if you can do so and wait for the comforting light of day. No spiders shall venture here," he added.

"I think we must," Luna blinked once, before staring at him gently and pointed unnecessarily to the ground, "I shall sleep here."

Ron shot her a sideways glance. "We should sleep together—keep each other warm," he added sheepishly.

Luna shook her head wearily. "No; do that we must not. Just in case someone should see," she added sadly, "do not lie so near to me," she continued. "You know that I would rather lie with you but just for tonight and honours strife, we must be apart until the lark, sings its sweet melody," Luna sighed as she rested upon the ground.

Ron smiled and moved away somewhat reluctantly. "Fair words, my love and be it so. I shall sleep away this night and rest beside the moons angel and wait for mornings light."

Luna giggled. "Oh, Ron. You big tease."

Within mere minutes, the couple had both fallen into a restful sleep. Ron had clutched on to a turf of grass beside himself and Luna's eyes were blinking furiously, as if compensating for her waking hours. It was less than half an hour later, when Dobby eventually found who he thought he was looking for.

"Back and forwards I've come to pass," he sighed to himself, "near and far across the forests grass. All the time, looking for the two lovers, yet nowhere to be found or heard," he muttered attentively. "Who's this, resting upon the ground? These two must be the teenagers my master spoke of and he," Dobby looked at Ron, "I am to bear with the flowers dew," Dobby moved across so that he was face to face with Ron. He moved in his sleep and Dobby shuffled slightly, before dripping the flowers oil in his eyes. "When you wake, my student friend, all bad tasks shall be made amends. When I leave, your eyes shall flutter and rest upon your lover!" he chuckled excitedly and skipped away from the clearing.

Hermione through a large branch across the ground, as she ran into the clearing, closely followed by a rather put off Draco. They both also appeared tired, yet the determination that rested on Hermione's face was priceless. She glared at Draco as he pushed her out of his way. An exasperated gasp escaped his lips, as his efforts were worthless.

"Kill me, Draco, for I shall die at any cost if you shall refuse to love me any longer!" Hermione whimpered, as she fell to the floor in front of him, as an attempt to stop him from walking forwards.

Draco growled angrily, reaching for his wand but then rejecting the idea. "Leave me, woman and haunt me no long. Your efforts are pointless, I have love not for you and only another," he preached; yet there was a glint of something else in his pearly eyes.

"You would leave me alone!" Hermione shouted, as Draco backed away from her and began to leave the clearing, "Say you will not do so!"

"You are slow and flustered like the ivy," Draco announced but she could still hear his voice, "I will go alone," he called, as he disappeared behind a wall of trees.

Hermione shook her head and rested upon one of the larger trees. She sighed wearily and looked about, failing to notice Ron and Luna lying on the ground nearby. She stepped forward and glared in the direction that Draco had left.

"I can't run any longer, I must take a rest before I completely loose my breath," Hermione said to herself sadly. "The more I sing, the less he listens and the more I follow, the less he watches," he decided. "Luna must be happy, wherever she may be. Her large, silver eyes have entrapped all she desires. I must be as ugly as Voldemort, if I can not even enchant a Malfoy," she lowered her eyes slightly and noticed Ron upon the ground. "But why is her hero here?" she bent down to shake him gently, "my good friend can not be dead, can he? I see no blood," her heart rested somewhat. "Ron, please wake up or I shall be down to minimal friends," Hermione shook him harder and his eyes whipped open violently.

Ron smiled warmly as he looked up at Hermione's face. "I shall wake for you and do much more, should you ask—for I feel as though I have found my princess at last!" he exclaimed and Hermione backed away slightly, "where is Draco, who has done you such harm. I shall curse him to nothingness if he has done you wrong," Ron said, standing to her height.

Hermione tried to shake his words away as she stared at him, shock forming in her eyes. "Ron. Do not say such things," she shouted at him, "what of Luna? Do you forget how you and she have been? She is your bride—far it be me," she added worriedly, watching his eyes shimmer with desire.

"How could I be content with Luna, when such beauty stands before me? My stomach growls at the very sight of you, Hermione. Every aspect makes me warm across my spine! No, by far, it is not Luna who I love but you, Hermione," he exclaimed, "can a red not become blonde? Can a weed not grow into a flower?" he questioned. "So be with me now," he reached forwards, "and make me a man," his eyes glowed with enthusiasm.

Hermione jumped backwards. "Ron, why do you mock me so cruelly?" Hermione asked, her eyes hurt by his desire, "why do you now treat me in this manner?" she shook her head violently, so her hair sprung about, "Draco won't look upon me and now you want to jump in bed with me," she cried, "you are doing far too much of a wrong, Ron and I scorn upon you," Hermione glared at her friend and stormed away from him, her nose high in the air as she left the clearing.

"She did not see Luna—perhaps I can convince Hermione to think her dead?" he considered hopefully, "do not awake, Luna for you must do me this one last pleasure and I shall not be near to help you if any terror," he paused in his words, "should come and torment you this night, into an unworldly state of fright," Ron grinned. "Now my love is to be given to Hermione, for this night and all eternity," he pranced away from the slumbering Luna and into the direction that Hermione had left.

Luna's eyes fluttered open and she rubbed them slowly, before remembering her dream and jumping into a standing position. Before looking towards where she had last seen Ron, she looked up at the moon and remember the dream.

"Help me, Ron!" she shouted suddenly, "I can't find my wand and there is a dream-demon in my bed! It tried to make me think that you no longer loved me and ripped my heart from my chest—oh, and look how I tremble in fear," Luna watched her hand as it shook ever so slightly. "Ronald. Where have you gone?" she looked about and behind a large rock in case he was hiding. "What, gone? Speak if you should hear!" she shouted and then whispered, "I am full of fear," Luna's voice trembled as wind rustled through the leaves. "Then I shall have to find you; unless death should find me first," she squeaked, as the howl of a wolf echoed amongst the trees.

Luna began to run away from the clearing, her cloak trailing in the leaves as she pulled herself away from the light. Still hovering in a silent, dreamy sleep, Nymph had been oblivious of the people who had been speaking below her and continued to rest the night away.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: And Nymph Met Hagrid**

As Nymph continued to rest under the silvery moon and stars, the selected people who were to perform at Tonks and Remus' wedding, arrived in the clearing after a long, tiresome trek through the woods. Hagrid was leading the way with Neville close at his heels. They were all dressed in heavy cloaks and Hagrid's large body shadowed Dennis.

Fred and George each used magic to make two chairs appear and the actors began to seat themselves into a circle. Hagrid went to sit upon one of the chairs but decided against it, as the frames looked very week and Hagrid had been eating rock cakes.

"Is everyone here?" Hagrid enquired loudly.

"Yes, yes," Neville nodded, "we all arrived together, remember? There's no way any of us would have wondered in here alone," he exclaimed to the half giant. The other members of the group nodded in agreement. "This is a perfect place to rehearse. It's so, desolate."

"Neville," Hagrid said slowly.

"What now, Hagrid?" Neville moaned, recognising the tone in the Professors voice.

Hagrid cleared his throat and began to wave his script about. "This comedy will never please, there are things about Pyramus and Thisbe that will confuse the audience," Hagrid began.

"Are you sure it's not just you?" Fred mumbled under his breath but was ignored by the Professor, who seemed unaffected by the laughter from the younger cast members.

"Pyramus kills himself by using a sword. This shall never do as it will scare the ladies," he informed them.

"More like in reality he would use the deadly curses," George informed them and all the gang except for Hagrid laughed. "Then we'll leave the killing out," he said sadly, seeing Hagrid's determined expression.

"No, that will not do," Hagrid moaned and Colin rested his face in his hands. "I have an idea that will be the solution to all our troubles. Neville, you can write," he stated bluntly, "you'll write me an intro-thingy and we well tell everyone who we are and that nobody was harmed during the making of this play and the performance."

Fred snorted. "That has yet to be tested," he muttered to his brother.

Neville sighed. "Very well, we shall do that but it will be short and serve a minor purpose," he added.

Hagrid shook his head. "No. It must be longer," he stated.

Fred laughed. "And won't the ladies be afraid of the lion also," he stated sarcastically and instantly regretted it.

"Oh, yes. I'd be terrified," Dennis mumbled.

"Of yourself?" George questioned.

Hagrid moved onto his high horse. "My, he is right! Can you imagine what would happen if they fled in terror, it would be the last time we set foot in the castle," Hagrid shouted, "there is nothing more scary than a lion," he added.

"Except a Slytherin."

"I guess your intro will have to include a piece about the lion also," Fred glared.

"We shall rip the suit in half!" Hagrid announced, "that way, they will see that it is indeed Dennis in a costume and that way they will also be able to see that he is as harmless as a man," Hagrid informed them and all the previous Gryffindors hated the idea of slicing their beloved mascot in half.

Neville bit on his lip. "Very well. We will use magic to repair the costume afterwards," he added, to the seriously evil looks the others were giving him.

"Will the moon be out on the night of our play?" Dennis asked, looking upwards.

Hagrid searched his large pockets and pulled out a calendar, as he passed it to Neville, Fred and George pretended to make kissing noises behind him, and looking at a nearby tree, resulting in Colin bursting into a fit of laughter.

"Yes; it's a full moon on the night," Neville nodded. "Dennis, you shall also play the moon shining over the wall when the lovers pass," he informed the youngest peer.

"And so a man must portray the wall, as well," Fred added, "and they can speak from under his arms," he informed the rest of the group.

"Then let it be so," Neville crowed, sighing once again, "you can portray that part. Now, we must rehearse or the performance will go down the toilet."

As the actors began to rehearse, there was a lot of noise and arguments as nobody could settle upon a suitable standing position. Whilst they were talking, they failed to notice Dobby approaching from behind a bush. His eyes widened as they settled upon Hagrid.

"What weirdoes are performing here? The Hogwarts Game Keeper and Master of creature's dear. Rehearsing the play for the wedding, no doubt. I shall listen and perhaps perform," he squeaked.

Neville turned to face Hagrid. "Come, speak now. We shall sort the movements later," he complained.

Hagrid took on the role of Pyramus and spoke as though he could not speak the words. "Thisbe, the flowers of odious savours sweet—"

"Odours," Neville corrected him.

"… Odours so savours sweet. S hath thy breath, my dearest Thisbe dear," he stammered the words, "but hark, a voice. Stay thou but here awhile, and by and by I will to thee appear," whilst the others laughed into their hands, Hagrid hid in nearby trees.

"A strange way to say and be," Dobby croaked, following Hagrid.

"Is it my turn now?" Colin asked.

Neville nodded. "Yes, yes," he added, "you must speak and understand that he has heard a stranger come to hunt him."

Colin cleared his throat and began to speak as Thisbe. "Most radiant Pyramus, most lilywhite of hue, of colour like the red rose on triumphant briar, most brisky juvenal, and eke most lovely, Jew, as true as truest horse that yet would never tire, I'll meet thee, Pyramus, at Ninny's tomb—"

"Ninus' Tomb," Neville moaned.

"Who wrote this rubbish?" Dennis moaned.

"Just call for Pyramus," Neville sighed tiredly.

"O, Pyramus!"

Hagrid appeared from behind a tree, closely followed by a discrete Dobby, who was keeping well out of the way. Hagrid was no longer sporting his wonderful, ogre head but a Donkey's face rested on an equally as hairy face.

Hagrid continued his speaking as Pyramus, totally oblivious to his transformation. "If I were fair, fair Thisbe, I were only thine."

Neville shouted loudly. "Hagrid, you've, you've improved," he backed away from Hagrid and the others followed queue. "Run!"

Dobby grinned eagerly as the actors ran around, trying to find a way out of the wood. "Now you shall meet the queen so dear," Dobby grinned as he teased Hagrid forwards, "I'll lead you to her bed where she slumbers, and all shall fall into place."

Hagrid scratched his head, failing to catch his long ears. "Why do they run away?" he questioned himself, "are they playing games?"

Fred ran into Hagrid's stomach and bounced backwards, "we are under attack. Hagrid, you have been Transfigured," he shouted.

"Stop being such an ass and tell me what you see?" Hagrid shouted and Fred ran away into the wood before he could supply an answer.

"Neville!" Hagrid shouted and the student quivered.

"Oh, Hagrid. I wish I could help but I failed Transfiguration and I don't really want to go the same way," Neville grimaced, before running away in the same direction as Fred had left.

All of the performers except for Hagrid remained in the clearing. He sat upon the large rock that was resting in the centre of all things. He leant on his elbows and pouted sadly, trying to work out why all the others had been so scared and work out what was wrong with him.

"This is to make an ass of me," Hagrid sighed once again, "I see their tricks. They were trying to scare me but I will not fall for their attempts to scare me. Scare me!" he repeated, "impossible. I shall sing to prove it." Hagrid cleared his throat and began to growl a song. "The Flobberworm, so slimy and pale, has not a voice strong enough to wail," he sang yet nobody came.

From high above Hagrid's head, Nymph woke from her sleep and began to lower down to the ground beside Hagrid. Her eyes were not fully focussed and she rubbed them playfully in an attempt to stir the sleep from them.

"What beauty wakes me?" Nymph asked with a smile. She looked up at Hagrid and fell forwards so that he could see her. "Oh, such a voice I wish to hear sing again, do so my good," she paused, "man," Nymph swayed forward. "My eyes have never seen, such a prize. How the singer shines in my eyes. Sing again, good sir."

Hagrid snorted. "I think perhaps you heard someone else, as there is little reason for you to think that," Hagrid informed the fairy queen.

"You are so wonderful!" she said, gliding forward and attempting to reach up onto his arms.

"I am? I think you are wrong. If I was wonderful then I would have not been left on my own," he informed her, beard twitching at her very sight. "And long me gone from this wood."

"You desire to leave me? Oh, do not go," she exclaimed in horror. "You shall stay with me, yet you know, all the powers that my shape does hold, will be shared with you, more expensive than Welsh gold. You shall have all that you need and want, so long as you stay with me," she smiled, "you big dolt!" she laughed lightly.

As though she had called with some silent charm, four fairies appeared from the trees in a circular formation. The fires that had been lit previously, once again began to flicker and Hagrid looked at the four dancing fairies expectantly.

"Ready!" stated a yellow, female fairy.

"You requested my presence!" a green, male fairy said.

"Ready!" exclaimed a blue, male fairy.

"As am I!" insisted another female fairy, yet this time coloured red.

In unison, the four fairies shouted. "How may we serve you?"

"Be good to this gentleman and give him all that he desires, whether it be wine, food or the most precious of all flowers. Sing to him as you would to me and let his life sore free, free as a bird as my spirit may be and as full as life as you or me," Nymph replied.

The green fairy looked Hagrid in the eyes. "Howdy, dude!"

Hagrid smiled and his beard twitched once again. "How must I call to you?" he questioned the fairies.

"Just call us by our colour," the yellow fairy informed him.

"Wait upon him, so much as he needs and then bring him to by chamber with heed. For I can sense a fulsome night and underneath the moons glorious light, we shall be adventurous of all our rights," Nymph stated sweetly.

The fairies each togged on Hagrid's large overcoat and began to drag him away from the clearing. Nymph followed behind gracefully, smiling to herself as though something pleasurable was about to take place. The clearing that had played host to so many people, suddenly became quiet and nobody was to be seen or heard.


End file.
